Tomorrow is optional

I’m told the world is going to end in September. Which is a pity as we’ve just finished decorating the bathroom. We’ve lived with that dreadful green coloured bath for ten years, finally got rid of it and then the world ends. Typical.

The coming of the end of the world was announced by a friend who read it on the interweb. And we all know how reliable that is.  As I recall, I have lived through quite a few ends of the world. You probably have too. The last major one was, of course, the 2012 ending. Some would have it that the logic behind this was as follows: “Here’s a Mayan calendar that only goes up to 2012. That means the world will end then.” I recall we had our own 2012 calendar on the wall that year. And, yes, the calendar showed all the months until December, then – nothing. Luckily some bright spark had the idea of printing a calendar for 2013, so obviously that meant things could carry on.

World ending events are bound to make one ponder and consider what one has achieved in a lifetime. My greatest achievement this week was driving all the way to work and having 29 green traffic lights on route. Twenty-nine! Now, that’s an achievement. If it wasn’t for the very last one, that 30th traffic light, I would have got the full set. I believe there’s some sort of award. The queen comes round with a knighthood or you get a year’s subscription to Reader’s Digest, something like that.

I am going to make a brave declaration here. I am going to boldly state that the world is not going to end in September. You have my personal assurance. If I’m wrong, you’ll be quite within your rights to send me a strongly worded email come the 1st of October.

There’s another very good reason that I know the world is not going to end in September. Because I started to write this in June 2015. No, it doesn’t usually take me this long to finish a post. But you know what it’s like, you write something and it falls down the back of the sofa. So I thought I would just finish it off and I can categorically state that the world did not end two years ago.

Of course, I do happen to believe that the world is going to end some time. So it is feasible that it could all be wrapped up next month. I just happen to think it’s going to be a very big surprise. No one is going to announce the day in advance. The end is nigh? The end is not nigh? There will always be a yesterday. But tomorrow is optional.


2 Comments to “Tomorrow is optional”

  1. That was really funny and kind of profound. Thanks Geoff.

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